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Don’t Be Jealous

September 23, 2009

True story:  a few months ago this message was sent to me by a suave character on Facebook (not sure which one he is in the photo below, but does it really matter?).

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“Good day….charming one i am perry uyi aigbovbiosa originally from Nigeria…,i was opportuned to go through your profile when i came across the angel that was declared missing..in heaven,then i took my time to find out what the Guidance angels where doing when you made your way out…any way lets just say i was fortunate because if you had not made your ways out from the heavens…who knows i wouldnt have come accross you…to start with i was all greatful to God for this tremendious looks that you posses…i believe it is God’s gift to you and i must say that you have all it takes to drive a man hell crazy…i was actually caught up by your endless beauty….that looks like a morning star..but you have to make a confession here by telling me the truth of how many thousand $ bribe you paid to have this classic looks..i will love to kno u more better .
Stay blessed

Perry”

Imagine my luck!  Of course I immediately friended this charming man and we quickly embarked upon a whirlwind long-distance Facebook courtship. He continued to woo me with his elegantly written words and he super-poked me with unique panache.  He told me he had a check for $43, ooo dollars he needed me to deposit for him.  I would get to keep $4,300 which I would need to send to him so that he could travel to Minnesota allowing us to consummate our love.  I could not wait to meet this debonair man in person, this man who thought of me as a missing angel, so of course I complied.  After waiting impatiently for several weeks I finally got the picture when he stopped accepting my Farmville requests and unfriended me.  I plaintively sigh as I re-read his dramatic first words to me now.  Although I am still trying to repay the bank the $43,000 I owe them, I will never regret my endeavors with my hell crazy man.

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